Into the Lion's Den: Lambs to the Slaughter

Argh. (I seem to be saying 'Argh' a whole lot more than I used to, nowadays. Anyway, where was I? Oh, yes - ) ARGH. School BAD. Writing Papers WORSE. Apartment Application FRUSTRATING. Buying new car TIRING AND EXHAUSTING. Jimmy Buffett concert GOOD but make Lymey go "Ow".

And that's a run-down of the last two weeks. In other words, if you allow me to translate the Frankensteinese 'Fire BAD!' above, I have had a fairly busy past 2 weeks. And yes, I know I missed doing the review for ILD1 last week, so, I will be attempting to get the reviews for the last 3 eps of season 3 up sometime with in the next week. Watch, I say that, then I always get yoinked away by school, that new anime series I absolutely *must* download off of Kazaa, or something extremely shiny.

So anyway. ILD1. Froony is like, a Farscape GOD. This ep, after the particularily disappointing IYYY, was fanfreakintastic. I would bear his children. Well, okay, maybe not go that far. But you get an idea of how much I dig... er, dug? Digged? Grammar. Argh. Anyway. How much I liked this eppy.

-This week's episode is brought to you by De Beers. A diamond may be forever, but our new I-Yensch bracelets can be used for pleasure!

-Man. This is one hell of a long "Previously on Farscape."

-Wheee. The whole 1950's World War II movie opening was cool. For a second it confused me and I thought that maybe scifi had screwed up, and was still playing Strange World!

-I just love the idea of Crichton telling Harvey 'Shut up, Private.'

-Oh, yeah. And hearing Harvey whimper in fear is great, too.

-OMG! Is Crichton chewing gum? He's chewing gum! He's there to kick ass and chew bubblegum, and there ain't no gum in left in the UTs!

-LOL, "let's turn the pod around and take these two back..." oh, yeah. Crichton would definitely make a dad. "You kids behave back there or I'm gonna turn this spaceship right back around and go home!"

-WHOA. BIG. SHIPS. OOO. Lotsa PK ships... we haven't seen this many since the Premiere!

-"Let's test the jewelry." Oh, boy, I'll help you test it, mmm, yeah, Crichton... er, sorry. Couldn't help perverting that statement.

-Anyone else think that the PK flag with the eagle lookin thing looks like something out of Nazi Germany mixed with Aztec artwork?

-"Do not screw with them." Can't help it, but it makes me think of the part in Fight Club where Tyler goes 'Do NOT f**k with us!"

-I love how Crichton can cow Braca with a few words reminding him of how he's kicked his ass a bunch of times now, hehe

-LOL... they walk in, and the bar goes dead slient... hehehe. Yeah, that was obviously gonna happen...

-So, his old crew hates Crais now... interesting.

-POTATOHEADGUY! He's baaaack!

-Oh my god, Crichton went Jerry Springer, he's throwin chairs!

-"I do not eat at the kiddy table!" For some reason, my mind is trying to pervert this, even though it doesn't even sound dirty.

-Lookit Braca being all Smarmy. When Crais calls him a consummate peacekeeper, he gets this expression on his face like he's been deathly insulted.

-Aeryn's having a flashback? Oooo. We don't get many of those.

-Chi? What are you doing? Being all whorish with the PK dood? And wavin' yer ass around? Seducing PK types isn't part of the plan...

-... surgery? o_O

-Aeryn's old friend... man, I'm surprised she was at all friendly towards her... but the whole drink in the face thing was kinda comin... but still, what a burn!

-BTW? Her name, Henta? Forever, in my mind, it is immediately translated to the word 'Hentai'. Hehehe.

-They're wearing funky 70's bathrobes!

-OWIE. Getting those rings taken out must really hurt... and he's using a pair of like, pliers you can find in the garage... hehee.

-Crichton and Aeryn definately seem to be on better terms this eppy! YAY! Shippers, there is hope!

-Plan C: Run like hell! Ah, he's been taking lessons from the Professor Arturo school of 'Run, run like hell'.

-Sneer? D'Argo? Wha? Noooo. Ass. GRR. Bad PK. Well, wait, I think that's the point.

-OH MAH GOD! It's Ash's evil brother! He's got the whole saw arm thingie... roflmao... Hey, Froon, let me guess, you're a fan of the Evil Dead movies?

-Jool is helping in a fight? WOW. Okay, I never thought I'd see the day that came.

-Something with shows I like the week this ep aired: People falling on to sharp things that kill em. On Farscape, it's FatAsh. On Alias, it was Noah...

-Hee. I love this irony. Scorpius making PK's be nice to Crichton and the rest of Moya's crew.

-BTW? I love love love love love Crichton's new jacket... as much as I like his duster, he does need a wardrobe change every now and then.

-Crais' room has a padded hamster wheel!

-Crais' got a girlfriend! OOO! Comment from my mom: "He kisses like a plunger." Course, she said the same thing about Crichton in SOD...

-His girlfriend has an annoying voice- WHOA I think I saw tongue!

-Aurora chair? The original was destroyed... so I guess this answers the question about whether or not he had backups.

-"I don't hate you." "I don't hate you either." Aw, it's the PK way of saying 'I love you.'

-*zones out at even the semi-technobabble* Okay, what? Physics aren't my strong part.

-Scorpy, stop violating John's personal bubble.

-Oh, look. Scorpy's gonna show John excerpts from "I was a Teenaged Scorpius".

-Next on A&E's biography, Scorpius!

-normalizing... biosignatures? That must mean Harvey has some control over this John's body...

-Oh my god, did he just say 'Hoo-Ha!'? He did!

-Bad Crais' girlfriend! Even if Crais is my least favorite, you better be nice to him!

-The little PK park seems kinda crowded by a lot of loiterers. And oh my god, I swear, I saw a redshirt in the background. *snerk*

-Must be cold. If you watch, you can see Crichton's breath.

-Wooooow. Bishan's a worse dominar than Rygel. That seems really, really, really funny to me.

-Uh oh, Chiana's going all acid-trip. Hey, Pilot goes, 'but there's nothing wrong!' You'd think that they'd learn to fekking trust Chi's visions by now already...

-WHOA! They shot Moya when she was going into starburst! ARGHHH! Not good, not good! Very bad!

-Aaaw. How interesting. Crais regrets not taking his little girlfriend, yet, there was the whole incident with Aeryn and Velorek... kinda hypocritical, ey?

-Ooo. "I didn't want to come back." OOOOH! Tell her why. Tell her cause of Crichton, cause he rocks socks and you wanted to make happy J/A porn that makes shippers go 'Awww.'

-Hehehe. Potatohead guy had a crush on Linfer.

-Go kick some scorpy ass, Crichton!

-WHOA. Talk about plunging neckline. This must be Commandant Cleavage... and she's wearing an Elvis collar! Look! Rhinestones and all!

-*snerk* *bureaucratic babble* And then Crichton and Aeryn look at each other, and knock the guys out. Hehehehe.

-OMG. The Luxan dood's voice is obviously dubbed... cause his lips don't match up with the voice! It reminds me of the old Kung Fu movies dubbed into english... *snicker*

-Braca reminds me of a used-car salesman. but maybe that's just because I've been dealing with them for the past week and a half...

-"I am infamous for making really stupid moves, yes?" OMG, I love Aeryn's expression and nod... it's like she's saying, 'Oh, hell yes. I've seen some of these decisions, and this guy's a regular moron!"

-"Damn, I gotta stop pointin guns at people!"

-Hmm. So, apparently, at some point between A Bug's Life and Season of Death, the marauders went through an update. They're no longer big boxy things, but look more like mini-Talyns.

-Yeah, I don't like Commandant Cleavage. She's a sneaky one.

-Okay, anyone else think that on that Tremors commercial that it sounded like someone was saying 'Holy sh*t!'? I swear....

-look, Moya's crew is bonding with the peacekeepers...

-oooo! Aeryn's showin some leg! WOOHOO!

-Crichton's got cold feet? He's sympathizing with Scorpy? O_o... yes, children, that is the sound of hell freezing over...

-But, woman, Crais *is* Scorpy's enemy...

-oooh, cool generator room. That so rocks. I kinda want one.

-ACH! John's getting the crap kicked outta him! But it's cool to see Scorpius having sympathy pains... I know that if I had to share one of those bracelets with Scorpy, I'd be doing stuff like smacking my head into walls.

-OH! COOOOOL! When the pulse weapon is fired and it kinda stops and goes backwards in midair... COOL!

-To paraphrase Dainichi: THAT IS SO BUCK ROGERS! The whole flying Rocketeer act was just fun, hehehe.

-This scene, however, where he fights Reljick on top of the generator, is reminding me of the Star Wars movies... thank god Crichton get a hand whacked off or find out that Scorpy was his father, ey?

-Aw crap. Aw crap. Aw crap. Don't radiate this Crichton! He's our only spare! I can only just imagine how panicked Aeryn must've been...

-Crichton looks like he feels like I felt after the concert last night... fashed out.

-"Why you bitchin at me like we're married, Scorpy Sue?" Scorpy Sue, I love you, with a heart that's oh-so-true, oh Scorpy, my Scorpy Sue...

-OH HOLY HOT CRAP ON A STICK, IT'S ERP!

-owie. owie. Knife in the wrist.

-Stop smacking Crichton's head on the table! ARGGHHHH!

-60 cycles? Aw, without wormholes, Crichton'd die before reaching it... but... holy hot crap. They know where Earth is now, kind of. Whoa. Wow. This is some heavy stuff.

And THAT is ILD1. And only 2 weeks after the eppy aired! *ducks heavy things thrown at her* HOI! Yewknockitofforelse. Really. I got busy these past two weeks! Honestly! I swear!

Preview for next week: Things going boom. (Yes, we already saw the ep. But I like things that go boom.)

And tonight, we get that final episode of season 4, written by Kemper. Which means, of course, that it will be horrifically evil and prolly have fans screaming and wailing in chat tonight... why did I just get a mental image of Kemper doing the Dr. Evil pinky-to-bottom-lip thing? I could so imagine him doing this in his office at like, 11:30 at night after everyone's gone home. Yeah. So who gets to be Mini-Me?

But hold tight, scapers! Season 4 starts in June! WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

Oh, how could I forget the obligatory SHAMELESS PLUG! www.paranoidcitroid.com! Wallpapers! Con coverage (Yes. I know. I need to get the megacon pics developed)! The Spastic Review ARchive! (Bad) Fan fiction! Farscape Music Vids! Random useless junk! Help, I can't stop using the exclamation point!


LBT, who really needs to piss like a racehorse...